Prisoner

I never ask to be stuck in between. I just want to be free. All my life, in my heart, for 16 years, all I ever wanted was to be free. Free from this house, free from this feeling, caging me from the inside without anyone ever noticing.

I. Want. Freedom.

I tried being the best, in everything so they could be proud of me. They can say, hey, isn't she something?

I studied hard. Tried being the best help. I got involved in so many things, just so they could be proud. When the D-day comes, I made it. Ya Allah, I finally made it. I got it. The victory sunk in a while. I was very proud no doubt. No doubt.

Just when I thought I could be free, then the prison caged me in. Once again, I am trapped, and it's hard to get out this time for I see no escape. Even if I was the best.

So I stopped trying. What is there to try for? I did try but what did I get? Nothing. Nothing at all.

I am always chained. It's okay, you'll get the rewards later on. Who else is going to do it?

Why me? Like WHY?!?!

I have dreams too. I want to go far too, I want to be somebody I'm proud of too.

But here I am, battling with these insecurities like a prisoner, because deep down, I am your prisoner.

And freedom was never an option. It was a decision made since the first day I smelled air.